The one where my jaw hit the floor
I've mentioned before that we don't always offer up info about how our family was formed, but when you work for a place that advocates adoption, good news travels fast.
One of the ladies I work with has a step-daughter. For the record, I hate that term and don't use it. She is a daughter, plain and simple. The Girl is five and has been in my friend's life since she was two.
We were talking about things the other day and she mentioned that once in awhile she will brush The Girl's hair. I'm thinking, once in awhile? because that is something I loved as a child and would love to do if I had a daughter - whether she liked it or not. I threw out there that at five years old her daughter must be pretty independent. We still do lots of things like that for The Boy - yes, even comb his long, curly locks for him because heaven only knows how that long hair would look were he to take care of it -or not- on his own.
My friend said, "Well, T***'s been through a lot being from a broken family and all. She's pretty independent."
"I've never been one to come running when she falls or cries, but then it's probably because SHE IS NOT PHYSICALLY PART OF ME AND I DON'T HAVE THAT BOND WITH HER."
I've never had that problem concerning The Boy.
I left the room feeling very sad for that little girl.
One of the ladies I work with has a step-daughter. For the record, I hate that term and don't use it. She is a daughter, plain and simple. The Girl is five and has been in my friend's life since she was two.
We were talking about things the other day and she mentioned that once in awhile she will brush The Girl's hair. I'm thinking, once in awhile? because that is something I loved as a child and would love to do if I had a daughter - whether she liked it or not. I threw out there that at five years old her daughter must be pretty independent. We still do lots of things like that for The Boy - yes, even comb his long, curly locks for him because heaven only knows how that long hair would look were he to take care of it -or not- on his own.
My friend said, "Well, T***'s been through a lot being from a broken family and all. She's pretty independent."
"I've never been one to come running when she falls or cries, but then it's probably because SHE IS NOT PHYSICALLY PART OF ME AND I DON'T HAVE THAT BOND WITH HER."
I've never had that problem concerning The Boy.
I left the room feeling very sad for that little girl.
posted by Well-heeled mom @ 8:25 PM
8 Comments:
At 11:19 PM,
Not-So-Normal-Mom said…
My hubby is in the process of adopting his sons-my sons from my previous marriage. I can't imagine him ever feeling the way that woman feels for her daughter. It sounds like she has turned off a switch in her heart and won't allow herself to feel that way for her. Sad, really.
At 4:17 AM,
Anonymous said…
chills.
how incredibly sad.
Carla
At 5:55 AM,
Alleen said…
Very sad indeed.
At 6:44 AM,
DD said…
Sounds like an excuse to not even try. Very sad.
At 10:20 AM,
Suz said…
She's FIVE. FIVE.
That is very sad.
At 5:08 PM,
Michelle Smiles said…
I hope someone else provides that for her. I've had 2 step moms in my life...and weird relationships with both because my mother was my primary caretaker. Honestly, I didn't want too much mothering from the step moms. So I really hope this little girl sees her mother often and gets that mothering she needs.
At 8:16 PM,
Priscilla said…
Oh I'm with you on the no step labeling. We don't do it in our family, either. My oldest proudly tells others that she has three parents, a dad and two moms. I am quite happily her "other" mother. :)
I feel so sorry for the lady you work with because she is missing out on the wonder of having a daughter. Blood doesn't make a family; love does. I hope she learns from your example of what love is!!
At 2:09 PM,
Foxxy One said…
That genuinely made my heart hurt. How sad for that poor girl.
Post a Comment
<< Home